Perry Framed

McConnellrifleWhile the CPAC photo-op of the week must so far go to Mitch McConnell’s rifle shot (take that Tea Party challenger), a close second would be Rick Perry’s new Swifty Lazar glasses.

swiftylazarLazar, the iconic Hollywood agent, made his thick black eyeglass frames a lasting signature. (By the way it was Humphrey Bogart who came up with the “Swifty” nickname for getting him three movie deals in a single day).

Perry is not known for being swift at anything other than his brief 2012 presidential campaign, which lasted about as long as it takes to chew a stick of gum. It turned out the much-heralded lion from Texas couldn’t help gnawing off his own limbs with dumb remarks, or in the case of a memorably embarrassing debate performance, forgetting top lines from his own stump speech, followed by his famous “Oops.”

perryglassesIt is a scientific fact that stupid people think glasses make you look smart. And if nothing else Perry does know his constituency.

Perry aides insist they are prescription glasses, not a fashion statement. We’ll have to wait for the medical records to be sure.

40 thoughts on “Perry Framed”

  1. OMG, Do I get to woo hoo?

    Ha! I knew there would be something good to read today, what with CPAC in session.

    The airwaves here are, thankfully, free of Ted Cruz’ whining in support of a candidate.

    At CPAC, his instance that moderating speech (if not beliefs) to win a campaign had done no good for Dole, McCain or Romney, well, look for a landslide Dem win if they pick the most Tea-baggery-ist candidate for their nom.

    Now, Jeb Bush may run this time…sure, why not?..but get prepared for George III.

    That’s right, George P. Bush has won the nom for TX Land Commissioner, which, here we go again with the gas & oil gangsters.

    It’s only a matter of time before he moves on up & eventually, runs for the WH himself.

    Heck, I do believe I saw his baby foot/handprints in the Childrens’ Garden at the WH, along with a half dozen other Bushes.

    blueINdallas(Quote) (Reply)

  2. I dunno, Craig. When people down here see someone wearing glasses, they might just think that person is one of them, there, stuck-up, edjamacated sorts.

    To whom would he be playing? Not his TX constituency.

    But, hey, maybe he thinks he’s too pretty to be taken seriously. You know, like the ex-half-gov of AK who reportedly had laser surgery and just wears glasses to glam herself down.

    What would Molly Ivins think of his new specs?

  3. Rick Perry is not smart enough to wear glasses to make him appear smarter. He’s wearing them so he an use the line, “I can see Mexico from my veranda.”

  4. I have to keep my CPAC viewing to an absolute minimum as it leads to sobbing into my hands while moaning, “What in the hell is wrong with your people?”

    Conservative as a political position is understandable. Despising your fellow human beings who don’t happen to absolutely mirror your mental aberration is not.

  5. In the old days demogogues won elections through singing country, spitting watermelon seeds (midge daniel’s sometime wife cheri is a champion spitter, in her own right), or pitching horseshoes, marksmanship, or out-ni**ering each other. Nowdays, the turtle midge shoots a .22 for his seat in the Senate, and rich peri shows off his ability to wear owl glasses. We didn’t think his nose was big enough to hold them up.

    Yup, these two southern ‘gogues are more of the same.

  6. Sorry, Blue, but geo. III is already taken. The last bush was geo. III, and it is to be hoped and prayed for, the last goldamn bush. The next george, should we decide to take that mission, will be geo. the IV, or just plain Ivy for short.

  7. I vote for props

    He started wearing glasses earlier this year
    and must think they are helping as Craig points he has made this new pair pretty obvious

  8. Glasses make you look more intelligent?

    I’m trying to imagine George W. Bush with glasses…

    Nah. Still looks like a dope.

  9. I wear hipster glasses (full disclosure), but I was wearing them before they were cool.

    Fin.

  10. A warning from the movie “Forbidden Planet” to all Republicans who want to be more intelligent…

    Beware of “monsters from the id.”

  11. I encourage you to take this intelligence test from “The Big Bang Theory” …

  12. Every time rick Perry looks in a mirror he sees a president. Her name is Hillary Clinton.

    The glasses won’t change the image. ;-)

  13. I feel bad that I attacked Rick Perry with memes, today. He is such a nice guy.

  14. What America needs now is a President that physically assaults people with whom he doesn’t agree.

    I’m so ashamed.

  15. Ignex: I feel bad that I attacked Rick Perry with memes, today. He is such a nice guy

    Ignex,

    Don’t feel bad. CPAC is a target rich environment.

    Just as well Perry as any of the others.

  16. The last time I saw Rick perry he was having a ‘maple syrup moment’

    It wasn’t the glasses on his nose, but rather the glasses in his hand.

    The only word that comes to mind is buffoon.
    Nothing has changed.

  17. Hm. Well, as far as ‘hate’ is concerned, I don’t hate a guy (Mitch McConnell) who raises a gun over his head on-stage like it’s a toy (I believe guns should be handled with the respect that something designed to murder and maim deserves), or a guy (Ted Cruz) who threatens to collapse the global economy (however futile) to score political points, or even a guy (Rick Perry), who actively seeks office while physically intimidating those who intellectually challenge him on policy or question his record, I am afraid of them and the damage I feel they can wreak in the lives of actual citizens, like myself.

    Whether they have a chance of getting elected or not, I feel any effort spent ensuring that they don’t is time well-spent.

    Not that my memes will be the difference-maker, but c’mon, they were hilarious! I have more! I will keep them to myself, though.

    : (

  18. is it a bird, is it a plane?
    is ricky going for the clark kent look or cary grant?
    harry potter?

  19. Maybe he’s trying to look like the Texas icon Buddy Holly. Could you imagine Rick Perry hanging around with someone like the Big Bopper….
    naaaah… neither could I…

  20. btw, watch your back after viewing above. neocons probably have it bugged. not exactly company approved.

  21. PATD: Great Peabody & Sherman video.

    They should show that on MSNBC every night for a week.

    But they won’t.

    The trouble with the mainstream media is they have NO knowledge of, or interest in, the history of any contemporary issue they are covering.

  22. What the Peabody & Sherman video alludes to but doesn’t specifically mention is that the CIA has always been run by Ivy Leaguers who do what is in the interest of the 1%, not the USA as a whole.

    That usually means doing whatever they can to maximize the profits of US corporations, which is where the 1% earns most of its income.

    The CIA has nothing to do with “spreading democracy.” In fact, they do just the opposite: they topple democratic governments wherever they can, and set up corrupt dictatorships that will allow US corporations to plunder their country’s resources…as long as the dictator and his cronies get hefty bribes.

    Corporations don’t like democracies because that means labor unions and that means they have to pay higher wages.

  23. “Most important, the United States must restore its standing in the international community, which has been eroded by too many extended hands of friendship to our adversaries, sometimes at the expense of our friends.” -Condoleezza Rice.

    Ms. Rice seems to forget who was primarily responsible for our loss of standing in the international community. We have seen the results of a ‘muscular foreign policy’ madam Secretary, it was on your watch.

    Here is the link, be prepared to throw up a little in your mouth.

  24. Getting back to the thread topic, here’s a “Seinfeld” clip from the episode entitled … “The glasses.”

    Key line: “Revenge is very good.”

  25. perry’s theme song?

    I don’t know why I keep on believin you need me
    When you prove so many times that it ain’t true
    [….]
    When reflections in your eyes show me a fool
    These rose colored glasses, that I’m looking through
    Show only the beauty, cause they hide all the truth

    So I just keep on hope-in, believin

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